I Don’t Have a Girly- Girl and That’s OK 31 Aug
“What grade is your son in?” a mom at the gym once asked.
“My daughter is in 4th,” I casually replied. <insert awkward apology>
I assured the woman that it was OK and not to worry about it.
It didn’t really bother my daughter. She was kind of used to it.
When this kid was a toddler, funny enough, she lived in princess costumes, and pink tutus were busting out of every drawer. Even though kicking a ball and swinging from monkey bars were always favorite pastimes, back then~frilly accessories were plentiful, and pants were obsolete. (Flashback to hog-tying Said toddler to put on pants when temps dropped below 40 degrees)!
Funny enough, when she was a toddler, she had lived in princess costumes, and pink tutus were busting out of every drawer.
Even though kicking a ball and swinging from monkey bars were always her favorite pastimes, back then, frilly accessories were plentiful, and wearing pants was obsolete. (Flashback to hog-tying said toddler to put on pants when temps dropped below 40 degrees.)
Fast forward, when she was a few years older…
She still liked to accessorize but it transformed into the form of mismatched Star Wars or Harry Potter socks, sports tights and trucker hats, often looking like a cross between a circus performer and skate rat.
She was just being herself, and preferred green and navy over pink and purple, and basketball and Ninja Warrior over ballet and barbies.
She wore board shorts and skull caps. She road skateboards and razors.
And, you know what? I didn’t care.
She was curious. Adventurous. Empathetic. Fierce. And kind.
I believe a kid can be all of those things. They can wear pants or bows, do pirouettes or shoot hoops, or a combination of all those things and more.
Being authentic is key. And learning this at a young age is golden.
Since becoming a teen, her style and interests have once again evolved and changed but one thing has remained the same:
For this kid and others in her generation, it’s not about “being” shoved into a box or defined as being girly or a tomboy.
It’s about viewing life without limits, not falling for stereotypes, and living their truth
She isn’t a girl wanting to be a boy.
She is a girl who wants to be herself.
rosie1998Posted at 11:24h, 09 December
Your daughter reminds me so much of myself when I was younger (19 now). I used to wear boy clothing from the ages of 8 to 16 – as you wrote – it had nothing to do with gender or sexuality – it was just me. When I was her age I really did not care about fitting in. However once the teenage years take over it becomes radically more difficult to just be yourself; wearing boy clothing, coupled with the fact that I had bilateral cochlear implants – I basically had a neon billboard on my head saying “I’m different”. This led to years of bullying and a low to non-existent self-image – but through it all I still remained me. Just tell your daughter to be fearless in the pursuit of being exactly who she wants to be. Dare to be different.